More Articles <<

Need for approval comes from a deeply rooted belief of not being worthy.  The very belief of unworthiness sends out an army to search for the seal of approval.  One’s happiness and sense of being gets trapped in the dependency on approvals.  Symptoms of this dependency are all around us but we call these symptoms a way of life.  For instance these symptoms show up from small statements like, “Do you think I look okay,” to “Do you think I will get the promotion,” to “Do you think the board will approve of our new business idea?”  Think for a moment, when you catch yourself making any of the above-mentioned statements:  Are you acting out of your need for approval or are you truly enjoying what you are doing?  Don’t look for an immediate answer, as the immediate answer will support your neediness.  You must dig deeper to come up with your own answer that is beyond the impressions of others, including the media, the advertisements, the latest fashion, the fastest car or the biggest mansion. 

Our need for approval began once upon a time when for the first time a group of small innocent girls and boys handed their test to an authority figure, who was probably four times as big as they were.  The results came back and either the little ones were patted on their backs for good results or were looked down upon for poor results.  Either way the little ones became addicted to seeking approval and carried that need into their adulthood.  Even though the system was designed to measure up to a high standard, whose standards were they using, yours or mine?  It may have made some kids sharp academically, yet it crippled the artist of many little ones that lies within each one of us.  The crippled artist with a masterpiece lying dormant within will now have to go through unlearning needy patterns to allow the masterpiece to blossom.  It is only then that the need for approval will disappear.  Then what would remain is the artist admiring the master piece and saying to him/her self “How could I have kept this art hidden from me?  It is so magnificent that it brings tears of joy into my eyes.  It is what I have been waiting for…  It is finally coming through me!  Let it not stop; this is what fulfills my being.  It brings me in the hear and now and it inspires me.  It is like I have become alive for the very first time!”

• Anything that does not come from within needs approval and everything that comes from within has already been approved. 
• Where in life do you look for approval?
• Does that feeling between needing approval to getting approval leave you disempowered?
• Would you label your need for approval as addiction?
• Is what you do or say imposed on you from your environment or is it original and coming from deep within you?
• Is there an artist within you that is being ignored due to pressures of life?

If you are not in touch with your artist within, spending a small amount of time in what inspires you the most will bring the artist out.  If you already know what your artist wants to express, then don’t suppress that magnificent power and unleash the creativity.  In unleashing the creativity lies the real magic of living.

Rhythm of Success
Neerja Bhatia
37 Island Heights Circle
Stamford, CT  06902
203-602-1174
nbhatia@rhythmofsuccess.com
http://www.rhythmofsuccess.com